back to back

I have a bad habit of overbooking myself.  And, I like to deceive myself into believing that I manage my time well.  But, I can take yesterday as a fine example of how I can exhaust myself because I can't say no.

Work was pretty busy, as we are preparing to close down our part of the College for the Christmas season.  I left work to go to dinner with some friends.  It was interesting...my first trip to the local Indian restaurant.  I left dinner, running late, to head with some other friends to the University of Memphis basketball game.  That game left me a little queasy.  I still can't figure out if that's because of the Indian food or the fact that Memphis held on to a win a game when they should have stomped on their opponent like an 18 wheeler would roll over a Prius.  So, I got back to the apartment around 10...the time that I like to wind down and relax.  But, no, instead I agree to go on a ghost hunt around campus.  The ghosts were sleeping or not in a mood to play.  I got home late and woke up early to get some things done this morning.  And, now, I'm going to rely on some strong coffee to help me make it through the day.

shoes

I've recently fallen into the trap of deciding shoes based on whether I want my feet to be comfortable or whether I want my feet to look nice.

Too bad that many of my shoes (at least for work) are not both fashionable and comfortable at the same time!

humility

Earlier today, I was studying some GRE vocabulary words.  Here's one I need to remember more: Humility.  Let's use it in a sentence...George thought vary highly of himself, but was considered by others to lack humility.

Dictionary.com's definition strikes me..."modest opinion or estimate about one's own importance, rank, etc."  

Oh, I love how lacking humility, at least in my case, often ends up with me getting slapped in face with some moment of reality when I learn how I'm no better than the next person.  That happened today.  I sent an email and used some wrong terminology.  And, in turn, I received a well-intentioned, but painful, email that put me back in my place.  The specifics are not important.  It's the lesson that matters.

Too often, I overestimate my importance, and, many times, at the cost of another.  To make myself more important, I demean someone around me.  Sometimes I use humor to make it seem okay, but it's not.  And, eventually, I end up with that knot in my stomach that reminds me that, not only do I now want to vomit, but we're on the same field.  Oh, this sucks.

Yes, we're all bowl eligible...

Yesterday, I make the long (2 hour) trip up to Raleigh to watch the NC State Wolfpack defeat the Miami Hurricanes.  My cousin, Samuel, works as a manager for the football team.  So, some of our family goes up to the games to support Samuel and enjoy the game and tailgating.  With the Wolfpack and the Clemson Tigers winning yesterday, that makes 10 of the 12 teams in the ACC eligible for bowl games.  And, they said we were a weak conference.

Here are a few of the photos from the game...

To be thankful for...

So, on this Thanksgiving Day, I thought I'd post a few of the things that I'm thankful for...

funny faces...

beautiful babies...

and priceless memories with family!

pictures from my vacation...thus far

Sunset from the back porch.

Zac Brown, my cousin, leading his team back into the game.

Aidan Brown, not paying attention to Zac playing

Maddie and her friend

Hunter...so cute

Hunter, again, posing for me

Winston, in a rare, calm moment

starting to give thanks

I arrived to NC yesterday, to spend Thanksgiving with my family.  Apparently, we like to draw out the celebration to about a week's worth of events.  It begins with Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow with the Simmons side of the family.  That being said, I scanned a lot of old pictures of the Simmons family today.  Below are some of my favorites:

   My mom and Dad getting ready to move to SC (1975-ish)

Dad and Uncle Sandy (1970-ish)

Pa, carrying my dad, with Aunt Paulky and Uncle Sandy (1951)

My dad, Aunt Paulky and Uncle Sandy (1956)

Aunt Susan, my Dad, Uncle Sandy and  Aunt Paulky (1956)

recovering

On Monday night, I made the decision to go to a basketball game between the University of Memphis and the University of Massachusetts.  This is normally not a big deal, but the game started at 11 pm.  It was all part of ESPN's 24 hours of basketball...though I think they took a break between 6-10 am.  Regardless, the game was good.

I did take, what I like to call, a "Khorey Baker 3rd Quarter" nap.  I dozed off for a few minutes in the second half.  But, all in all, the game was entertaining, even though it ended at 1:30 am...on a school night.

Yesterday morning, I woke with a sore throat and the achy feelings of getting a little sick.  I'm still battling that right now. I've got some Cold-Eeze, Afrin and Tylenol Cold and Flu.  

I leave tomorrow to head to NC for about ten days.  I've found out that my family likes to extend Thanksgiving, so some festivities will begin this weekend.  Good thing I booked that ticket for when I did.

Yes, I'm Decorating...and I know it's early

I've decided that I'm decorating my apartment for Christmas this weekend.  So, I love Christmas. The trees.  The lights.  All of the sights, sounds.  I love the smell of Christmas.  (By the way, to me, Christmas smells like apple cinnamon.)

My snowman was ready to come out of storage, so I had to comply.  Plus, the Santa Claus in the background sings while he rocks in the rocking chair.  I mean, you can't keep that hidden.  

So, my decorating traditions include watching Love Actually while decorating.  Once the movie is done, I'll probably put on a listen Christmas music.  And, I don't want to hear any chastising because it's still the middle of November.  I'm leaving next week for ten days.  Then, I'll be back here for only a few weeks before heading home for the holidays.  This way, I get to enjoy it all!

James Bond

Before last night, I had seen one James Bond movie in my lifetime.  For me, that was enough.  But, I gave into peer pressure and went to the midnight showing of Quantum Solace.  Now, I can say that I've seen 1.5 James Bond movies.  Well, that might be generous, because I think I feel asleep about 40 minutes into the movie.  And, I'm okay with that.

a new update

Well, the number one story on the news in Memphis tonight was about how a mom got on a bus with a gun.  Maybe I should have watched more, but I quickly changed the channel to some sporting event...football, I think.  

So, I wanted to post some pictures from my recent events.  First, I travelled on a whirlwind trip through the Carolinas not long ago.  I flew into Charlotte, drove to Buies Creek for Campbell Homecoming, drove to Hilton Head for a conference, and then back to Charlotte to fly out.

While in Hilton Head, I did some alligator hunting.  Here are a couple of pictures of my successful trip...

That's the alligator in the background.

This is my dad searching for some colorful leaves for me to photograph.  And, some of the leaves are below.

In my week back in Memphis, I've managed little beyond lying on my couch recovering from an illness that overtook me.  I did, however, make it to a recent service project for Mortar Board, an Honor Society that I advise here.  The characters in those pictures were played by some of our outstanding seniors!

Biscuit the Dog and Pig are "making out"--oh, the things we do when we get bored.

right vs. right

I think I worry too much about saying things in the right way rather than saying the right thing. Maybe I'm overthinking this, but....

I think that we live in a culture that tries to see too much behind what a person is saying. Perhaps, that's because too few people make themselves transparent and even fewer actually say what they truly mean to say. I'm guilty. I distinctly remember a time in my life when I played these mind games where I would say something (that I didn't really mean) in order to evoke a reaction or a primed response.

I think I'm even guilty of believing that this a new concept to my generation. In fact, it's probably been around for centuries. Maybe that's why Jesus spoke in parables. Because the disciples were looking for something deeper than His words provided.

Whether I'm naive or just not that deep, I'm ready for a shift to the organic. Real and true cultivated relationships, where you don't wonder what the other person meant when they asked if you wanted a regular coffee or a latte.

iowa for the weekend

I went to my first Campbell University football game this weekend...in Iowa.  My friend Kelli and I met up with other friends from Campbell (Scott, Hayley, Shaun, Melissa, Jacob, Joel and Rebecca) in Iowa.  We started off our Saturday at the Iowa State/Nebraska football game.  At some point, in the 3rd quarter, to drive to Des Moines to catch the last half of the Drake/Campbell football game.  

When we left Ames, Iowa the score was Drake: 3; Campbell: 0.  When we got to the Drake Stadium, Drake had scored a few more times.   We did, however, manage to find a gate keeper who let into the stadium for free.  He told us Campell needed our support.   We cheered...or at least tried to.  Scott and Shaun made up a new fight song.  It's short, it's simple, it's rousing.  (O Campbell, we love thee.  Fight, fight, fight to Victory.)

The final score was something like 45-0.  We're hoping that this was the last big defeat.  I think the boys need some encouragement.  We're hoping for some turnaround, so that we can return to victory at Homecoming.

football in the south

Prior to moving to Tennessee, I never knew that Saturday afternoon football games were an time to dress up in shirts and bowties (for men) and sundresses (for the ladies.)  See, my family was never all that enthusiastic about football.  We were a little more focused on basketball and baseball/softball.  I think things started to change when my brother played football his senior year of high school.  (We had reason to like football before that: 1. My uncle was an amazing high school football player and 2. I grew up under the shadow of the winningest football coach ever, John McKissick.)

I thought you would wear jeans and a shirt/sweatshirt that bore the colors of the team for which you were cheering. I thought you watched the game and cheered for your boys.  I thought, perhaps incorrectly, that football games were about football.

But, now, the SEC tradition of football in the South has changed the way I see Saturday afternoons in the fall.  It's not about the game; it's about the tailgate.  It's not about cheering; it's about seeing people and being seen.  It's not about winning; it's about corn hole, beer pong and who can hold the most alcohol.  Use Ole' Miss here as an example.

In other news, I took the picture below last night on the Mississippi at sunset. I think it's pretty cool.  The bridge is I-40 passing over the Mississippi River.

some pictures

Reflections

The stairs at City Museum

Habitat for Humanity Build--Adam and I were cutting the boards

Habitat for Humanity--after a rain shower, lots of mud and some house building

my job and my life

Sometimes it's hard to distinguish between the role of my job from the rest of my life.  I mean, the line is easily blurred because I still live in College Housing. (Two notes about that: 1.  It's a great way to say money and live nicely. 2.  I've made my apartment to feel completely different from the atmosphere of a college dorm.)  But, when I go home from my office, I'm still at work.  I have to address issues that I see when walking somewhere on campus.  Do you know how hard it is to always be "on call" and alert and ready to be seen as the "bad guy?"  It's certainly not easy.  But, I do like a challenge.

So, let me talk (er, write) a little more about this strange dichotomy that exists between being available to the students and seeking a balance in my life.  Some staff here would say that you need to make sure that you have time for yourself.  Others would focus on being available to the students with whom you work--get involved.  And, most would say that we all need to find a balance between those two things, get involved and get a life of your own...outside...away from the campus gates.  I just don't know how to do it.

I look at my life right now.  See, this weekend was suppose to be pretty relaxed.  Chill.  Lots of down time to recover from the crazy month of August.  But, now, I'm looking at what I've got to do and I'm like, "where did all of these commitments come from?"  I worked with my boss to get her to agree to talk about my having a dog in my apartment.  And, that alone was a great victory.  But, looking at the situation from a responsible mindset, I realized that it would not be fair to the dog that I would own.  I'm not home enough, on a regular basis, for the dog to receive the love and attention that it would deserve.  I believe that many people in my profession, especially those in Residence Life and Student Activities, feel this burden.  How can I even think about settling down when I'm not capable of dutifully attending to a pet?  I imagine a husband (and one day kids) would require more time than a dog.

hurricane season

So, it seems like September is shaping up to be an exciting month in the Atlantic Ocean.  That's not surprising, since the past two years have been relatively tame.  I think that the Southeast depends on some activity to generate rain during the drier months, though it's certainly a struggle.  I mean, hurricanes bring rain, but they also bring wind gusts, storm surges and random tornadoes.  

I think any kid who grew up in a state with a coast has a story about that one big hurricane.  Mine was Hugo.  I was 10, in the Fifth grade, and I thought it was awesome.  I imagine, in fact I know, that my parents viewed it quite differently...especially since they were parents and property owners.  To me, it was an extended vacation.  Sort of like a long camping trip at home.  I mean, we didn't have power for a while and we didn't go to school for a while longer.  I remember a picture of the boats from the Charleston Harbor that landed in the middle of downtown streets after the storm surge receded.  But, what I remember more, was how "perfect" of a storm Hugo was.

You can google the images of Hugo.  They're quite different from the images of Katrina.  We didn't suffer the extensive flooding like the Gulf Coast did.  But, we had some spectacular images.  The Ben Sawyer Bridge turned and shoved into the river.  The side torn completely off of the hotel that sits on the Battery.  The boats in the middle of the roads.  And, all of the trees without tops.  I think was is actually really amazing is that Hugo was still a category 1 hurricane by the time it reached Charlotte, NC.  That alone demonstrates how compact, dense and, perhaps, perfect the storm really was.

update 8.28.08

So, the month of August flies by.  I mean, it's one of those times of the year that I look back on and can't remember how one day led into the next.  And, what's equally interesting is that each day holds so many new experiences that last week seems like months ago.  And, after three pretty relaxed months, I enjoy the time.  In fact, it's my constant work with the awesome people that truly makes me forget how old I am. 

The pictures on this entry were taken over the past few weeks.  The top one is a selection of students with whom I work.  And, I'll say it again, these are the kids that will one day shape the world for a better place.  They are just THAT good.  The second one was my glow-in-the-dark, miniature golfing

team.  We were pretty awesome.  John (far left) and I tied for first place.  

So, these next pictures were from Fire Safety Training, with Memphis Firefighter Jeremy Lansing.  Jeremy has come out to Rhodes a couple of times to teach the students how to use a fire extinguisher.  I think that most of the girls get really passionate about fire safety after the training.

And, this is John.  John really got into the training...to the point of donning the gear (except I think he was wearing flipflops) so that he could re-light the fire after it has been extinguished.  

But, that's a glimpse of my life over the past few weeks.  Now it calms down and I get to actually remember the days as the fly by.

29 footprints

I think I feel deeply.  I mean, I get emotional.  Watching the Opening Ceremonies of the Beijing Olympics has made me get a little choked up several times.  I think the synergy and symmetry of it all is so beautiful.  The history.  The performance.  The harmony.  Knowing that weeks and months of preparation went into this...a platform that is built on competition and unity.  (Those are, by the way, two of my favorite things.  I like to compete...and win.  But, I cherish unity.)

 Fifteen thousand performers.  That's four thousand more people than the Olympics have athletes.  And, no one was used twice.  Watching over 2,000 Tai Chi masters execute at the same time while formed in perfect circles is awe-inspiring.  The large scale, with attention to the small details.  All of it held in a place nicknamed "The Bird's Nest."  

Perhaps the coolest thing, was watching the fireworks of footprints, 29 in all, flash across the Beijing skyline and walk their way, one per second, to the Opening Ceremonies. That, and seeing the men, women and children smile and wave.  So, I'll shelve my opinions of China right now, and focus on the beauty of the Olympics.  

hard questions to answer

So, I picked up a book at the airport on the flight home from my Uncle Sandy's funeral called "How to Talk to a Widower."  Probably a bad choice, but it happened.  And, I've been reading the book while working out.  And, there have been some comforting instructions.  Like, it's okay to not know how to respond to the comment of "I'm so sorry for your loss."  Like the widower says, "what, are you suppose to say 'thanks?' That just doesn't seem right.  It's like you're thanking them."  

I'm not sure if it's profitable to put my feelings out here, mainly because I really wonder if people care about others.  I'm not trying to sound cynical, but really...when you ask others how they're doing, do you really care to hear if the answer is "not so good."  And, if you do entertain those comments, then it's only a few sentences into the explanation before you're thinking about your "to do" list or what you're having for dinner or "did I remember to turn the coffee pot off this morning?"  You get caught up in your own worlds too often and forget that everyone we meet is fighting some kind of battle. (And, I say "you" because it's easier to make the accusation than to make it personal--but all of those "yous" above are really "I" or "me.")  It's not always great or good or, even, okay.  Sometimes it's just rough.  

wrecked...

So, this morning, I had every intention of going for a 25 mile bike ride.  It would be my longest of the summer, to this point.  Last weekend, I did 20 miles and wanted to continue to build my long ride endurance.  I went to Shelby Farms, which provides a mixture of low traffic roads and some off road trails.  At around mile 16, I started up this brief hill.  Some new gravel had just been laid, so I move to the right to avoid most of the gravel.  As I did, my rear wheel sunk into the gravel and the bike slipped out to the left. I, however, fell to the right...right on my shoulder.

I wasn't wearing a helmet, but I didn't hit my head.  No harm, no foul there.  But, I did take most of the impact on my shoulder.  And, now, I struggle to move my right arm. (Fortunately, my fingers are still working in good order, so that I can type this blog.)  I also skinned my leg and arm a little.  But, this is not my worst bike accident.  No, that happened when I was 13 and hit a parked car.  My brother's sympathetic response to my accident today was "at least you didn't get hit by a car."  See, my brother saw me immediately after my accident when I was 13--beaten and broken.  And, he recently pointed out to me that I should consider avoiding biking.  This was my third accident in the three years that I've lived in Memphis.  And, yet, I don't plan to give up bicycling any time soon.

quotes from a book

I read a book called "The Irresistible Revolution" by Shane Claiborne while I was in NC on vacation and I wanted to remember some things he wrote. So, I'm scribing them onto my blog...

"I had a college professor who said, 'All around you, people will be tiptoeing through life, just to arrive at death safely. But dear children, do not tiptoe. Run, hop, skip or dance, just don't tiptoe.'"

"There is a brilliant truth I have come to see, largely because of Dietrich Bonhoeffer, spiritual writer and fellow register, whose words are now inscribed on my wall: ' The person who loves their dream of community will destroy community [even if their intentions are ever so earnest], but the person who loves those around them will create community.'"

back in memphis

So, I'm back in Memphis after spending a while in NC.  It was good to see the family.  I got to spend some quality time with my grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins.  Moreover, Kevin and Amanda and I got to spend time with mom and dad.

On Monday afternoon, Amanda and I went walking in the lower field of the farm to see if there was water in the creek.  (See, Central NC is in a severe -er, exceptional- drought and it poured rain on Sunday.)  And, there were some splashes and pools of water around.  And, as Amanda and I stood and stared at the random accumulations of water, Amanda notices a large bone laying in the creek.  I mean, this thing could be the size of a dinosaur's shoulder blade.  Well, now that I think about it, it was more likely the hip bone of a cow.  Regardless, it was a large bone laying in the creek. So, Amanda and I set out to find more bones.  Amanda (now nicknamed Long Feather--completely unrelated story) finds the skull of a small animal, with the upper jaw still holding onto teeth.  We took the bones back to my dad to get confirmation of what they belonged to when they were being used.

And, we all got to play the Nintendo Wii...a lot.  I was sore several days.  My mom learned that she was a better bowler left handed, as she was trying to give her arms an equal workout.  Kevin is the most efficient user of the Wii.  Though, Winston is the most vocal.  I don't think he appreciates the animated characters.  He likes to growl at them.

pictures from the 4th

Here are some pictures from Stanly County, NC.

An Outhouse (not in operation)

Eli and Aidan at the Oakboro Parade

A really hot guy at the Parade

Sunflowers at the Farm

Candy Apples at the Fair

panning for gold

Today, my mom, dad and I visited the site of the first discovery of gold in the United States, the Reed Gold Mine, in Central NC.  There were gold nuggets of 17, 23 and 28 pounds found there during the 18th and 19th centuries.  I sat through a video, actually slept through some, and learned a little about gold mining. 

My dad and I panned through some rock and I ended up sorting out two gold flakes and a sliver.  The guy at the panning troughs put my gold in a vile for me and now I have a keepsake.  All, in a days work.

farming

I've been learning to farm.  Today, I operated the John Deere lawn mower for about two hours and trimmed the orchard and yard.  I've picked cucumbers, raspberries, blackberries, blueberries, tomatoes and apples.  I've been watching the cantaloupes, watermelons, corn and peppers grow.  Now, my dad has done most of the work and my mom has picked gallons of berries.  And, I'm sore.  I might have to blame the soreness on my obsession with my mom's Nintendo Wii.  

baking

So, I'm home in NC for the week...and the garden on the farm is in full bloom.  Actually, it's past bloom and moved into delivery.  Today we picked blueberries, blackberries and raspberries until we couldn't stand it anymore.  I'm sure there are still plenty still left on the vines (in some cases branches.)  But, we've decided to turn these delicious fresh fruits into radical concoctions of muffins and trifles (thought not like the Friends version of a trifle.)

As we speak, my mom is baking.  I made her pause for a picture with me.  Here it is:

We're working on a batch of double berry muffins.  I've found that these Kitchen Aid mixers are something.  They basically do the baking for you.  I'm giving this mixer a name...what about Sylvester? I believe that I could simply put the ingredients next to Sylvester and he would just take care of the rest.  He could probably even put the mixed ingredients into the oven.  He's just that good.

who knew?

So, I was sitting here in my office around 8 am, trying to figure out a way to motivate myself to get started on some very important work. We'll, let's be honest, it can't be that important. Regardless, I started searching through podcasts on my iTunes and was listening to the most recent Catalyst podcast, when Steven Furtick was suddenly speaking through my computer. See, Pastor Steve grew up close to where I grew up...the Low Country of SC. We went to rival high schools, though we didn't know each other. Actually, I'd never heard of Pastor Steve until I went to church with my cousin Lindsey in Charlotte. She's been attending Elevation church..a relatively new church that is growing by leaps and bounds.

So, I googled Pastor Steve to see what's been going on. I mean, I figured that he's been moving up the ladder of notoriety to be included on a Catalyst Podcast. And, what I found was actually alarming. There were several blogs and articles dismantling Pastor Steve. And, I'm not sure if I'm either naive or taking things out of context, but there just seems to be too much hatred and disdain among Christians towards other Christians.

Let me relate this back to what I've been reading and learning. We (the Church--the one that Jesus died for) love to condemn others. I think it makes us feel better. And, please notice that I'm using the first person plural here. We (I'm stand with my brothers and sisters in guilt) thrive in hate and are void in love. True love is lost in our generation. I see it propelled in the media. Our society feeds on the weaknesses of others. And, hatred among brothers and sisters in Christ weakens our call from our precious Lord. If you don't like the message that someone is preaching, then by all means, go to another church.

Sometimes, it seems that we feel the need to complicate things and make them harder. I feel like Jesus made the message simple enough so that all can understand. I'm going to go and listen to the Beatles song "All We Need is Love."

the dentist

I had a dentist appointment this morning.  My dentist office is this mom and pop shop.  It's just a three person operation...Dr. Elliot (the dentist), Corrine (his wife--the admin.) and Dawn (the hygienist.)  I like the fact that when I walk in, they know who I am.  They remember the conversation we had six months ago.  I feel like it's a simpler way of life.

Speaking (or rather, typing) about simple ways, I'm reading this book by Shane Claiborne called "The Irresistible Revolution."  It's got me thinking...and acting a little different.  I'm not an ordinary radical, but I do believe that I need to have a greater impact on my world.  (Claiming this as "my world" is a struggle for me, since I like to share and say "we" a lot.  But, the impact I have is on my world.)  Anyways, it's a book worth reading.  It's one of those that shakes you up a little, if you let it.  And, sometimes it's good to get shaken up a little.

I think I'm going to see if Brent wants to play Rockband for a while.  I'm working on my rhythm by playing the drums!

it's raining

Tonight, I went to get my headlight fixed on my car.  I recently was informed that it was burnt out.  It was a kind police officer who blocked my car from advancing through a traffic light and megaphoned me that I needed to turn on my lights.  I told him they were, only to find out that one was not.

So, I drove to the friendly Advanced Auto Parts, where a helpful guy named Timmy tried to install the replacement light bulb.  Apparently, it's a huge ordeal to change a head light on a Pontiac Vibe.  I think Timmy mentioned some disassembling of my car in order and the need for a hacksaw to perform the service.  I opted to get the dealer to fix it, along with some other needed repairs.  Timmy thought that was a good idea.

On my way back, I got caught in one of those storms that the South is famous for.  You know, the one where it's raining on one side of your house but not the other.  And, the storm comes out of nowhere.  But, it's been a while since it's rained and it smells so good.

this week

So, this week, my bff in Memphis, Khorey, left to move back to Florida.  It was sort of sad, but he left at like 3 am, so I wasn't awake enough to really reflect about it.

And, I just found a video that our RAs made about a year ago.  It's a satire about a day in the life of the staff in our office.  I'll see if I can upload the video.  It's sort of long, but I'm amazed at how the students really picked up on the small details and quirks of each of us.  

pictures

So, I love photography.  I love looking at good pictures.  A great image moves my soul.  And, I've been sitting here uploading my pictures from Nicaragua.

In photography, as in many other things, I judge myself against others.  Where do I stack up? But, as I sat here looking through my pictures, I realized that those moments captured in time were each special to me.  Here are a few.  (There will be more uploaded to the site at the right.)